Saturday, June 6, 2009

So, this is why Elly was laughing at work....

Elly was cracking up laughing during the middle of work.
As her cubicle is directly opposite my loverly dirty blue cubicle wall, I couldn't see what she was doing...
Then this e-mail popped up on my computer from her and I thought I would share...nice of me, huh.
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"THE IS VERY FUNNY TO ME LOL"

When girls don't put out!!

This was written by a guy...it's pretty damn smart.

Girls -- Please have a sense of humor!

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ
so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing.. I
have never figured out why men think with their head and women with
their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE:

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.
Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, 'I don't
feel like it, I just want you to hold me.'

I said, 'WHAT??!! What was that?!'

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to
hear...

'You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for
me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.'

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, 'Can't you just love me for
who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?'

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to
sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time
with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big,
big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried
on several different very expensive outfit s. She couldn't decide which
one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes
to compliment her new clothes, so I said, 'Lets get a pair for each
outfit.'

We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of
diamond earrings.. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have
thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was
testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even
know how to play tennis

I think I threw her for a loop when I said, 'That's fine, honey.' She
was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.
Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is
all
dear, let's go to the cashier.'

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, 'No honey, I don't
feel like it.'

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled,
'WHAT?'

I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while.
You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me
to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.'

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added,
'Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy
you?'

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either.....but at least that
bitch knows I'm smarter than her.

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1 comment:

Coffeypot said...

Now that was funny!